Excerpt from The One Night Stand
By Joey Bigornia
I was once having dinner with a friend at Nuvo Greenbelt when I noticed the woman sitting at a nearby table. She looked oddly familiar, but I couldn’t place her immediately. The woman rang no bells. She was rather tall, nice-looking and while she wasn’t exactly heavy, one could tell that in the future, she would run to portliness.
I resumed my conversation with my dinner companion, but part of my brain was already running a search on the woman’s identity. It distresses me when I can’t remember things instantly. I begin to worry about Alzheimer’s disease.
Halfway through dessert, the combination of rum and sugar must have kicked some dormant nerve into action, because I suddenly remembered who she was. A dreamy white-sand beach in Subic, a sexy surfer girl and me. She waxed my board, I juiced her pineapple and we both had volcanic eruptions with hot lava flow. The next morning, she caught a wave, I caught my ride and we never saw each other again. Now, one year later, I see her sitting cross-legged across from me, with husband in tow.
One-night stands. They’re the first time you have sex with someone—and the last. They can occur anytime and anywhere, but the opportunity usually presents itself during a vacation (“You’re leaving tomorrow?”), a business trip (“Me, married?”) or Friday nights at Valkyrie (“Care for a fuck?”).
A first-night fling is usually not the start of a beautiful, long-lasting relationship. This is because most people have a set of criteria for choosing a potential boyfriend or girlfriend (“Someone I like hanging out with and who has similar tastes and shares my interests and who I wouldn’t be embarrassed to take home to my mother.”) and another set of criteria for one-nighter material (“I’m horny.”). As a result, the idea of thrilling sex with near strangers is so exciting that you permit their one big plus (a hot bod) to overshadow their many minuses (tacky clothes, an obnoxious personality, killer body odor). Heavy drinking is often the lubricant that ends up facilitating a one-nighter in the first place, but that doesn’t mean that downing ten tequilas and jumping into bed with a total stranger is a good idea.
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